


Valentine's Confession

by Reila_Flowers



Category: Dir en grey
Genre: Coming Out, First Time, M/M, Romance, Slice of Life, Valentine's Day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-14
Updated: 2020-02-14
Packaged: 2021-02-27 20:33:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,738
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22721755
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Reila_Flowers/pseuds/Reila_Flowers
Summary: Working far from home, Kaoru is surprised to see how different Valentine's Day is to what he knows from back home. This is a day for romance, a day for confessions of love but the person he wishes to confess too isn't exactly who anyone would suspect.
Relationships: Kaoru/Shinya (Dir en grey)
Kudos: 11





	Valentine's Confession

It was a cold day, the kind of day when you appreciated your coat and gloves, even though they still left you feeling rather chilly. Even in the warm café waiting for his friend, Kaoru felt like his body may never be fully warm again. When had the weather took such a frightful turn? His cheeks must be bright red from the bitter wind, or maybe that was just embarrassment as he thought about what he wanted to say to his friend when he arrived.

It was Valentine’s Day here, a holiday both familiar and alien to him at the same time. It seemed in The West this wasn’t a day when girls gave chocolates to those they appreciated and loved, rather it was more like Christmas Eve where couples celebrated together. Though Christmas Eve here may be different too. It was difficult being in a foreign country at times, to understand the culture and all the little nuisances that went with it. His band mates, most of them, had decided to embrace the day and had flown dates over or found them here while they worked on the new album so far from home. Kaoru had been tempted to date to, but upon learning Shinya was going to be alone he had politely turned down the girl who had seemed interested in him. Just supporting his bandmate, that was what he had told the others and naturally they believed the man they joking called The Dear Leader.

Spending the day with Shinya should have been easy enough. They genuinely got on well and whilst shy, Shinya never had any problems sharing things with him. They could just have a drink here, find somewhere warm to enjoy the day before finally stopping for dinner.

Nervously Kaoru sipped at his coffee, knowing it wasn’t like him to feel this way. He was normally calm and collected, nothing phased him. Not performing before thousands of fans, arguments with angry managers, that crazy stalker who had actually issued a couple of death threats. These were all things he took in his stride but today was different. He was beginning to feel a little anxious, he wasn’t as calm as he had hoped to be.

It was just that it was unfamiliar territory and his confession would change everything. Was he really going to risk this? What if it broke apart the band he worked so hard to keep together? Silence would destroy the band too, Kaoru found himself reasoning. He wasn’t sure how much longer he could work with Shinya, if he didn’t get this confession out in the open. Might as well dive in head first and deal with the consequences after the dust had settled. That was the usual way he handled unpleasant situations, which he honestly hoped this wasn’t going to be.

He smiled as Shinya entered the café, looking around for a moment before approaching Kaoru’s table. He wasn’t late, perfectly on time in fact, but for a man like Kaoru who was always a little early the wait had felt like an eternity.

“Looks like Dear Leader beat me here, as always,” Shinya teased him as he took a seat across from Kaoru and reluctantly removed the knee length coat he had been wearing. Shinya hadn’t made an effort with his appearance, why would he when this was just a meeting between friends? Still, he was well dressed and put together as he often was. It was a rare occurrence to see Shinya slacking on such things, Kaoru often wondered how the other even found the time. Some days the most he could do was wash his hair and pull on clean clothes. “That’s cute, they gave you a heart shaped biscuit.”

“It is,” Kaoru agreed, knowing Shinya would appreciate such a little thing. “At least in this way, Valentine’s Day here isn’t too different.”

“I don’t think the holiday here is that different,” Shinya commented. “Girls still buy their boyfriends gifts, I saw a girl on my way here exchanging gifts with her partner, it’s just that the men give gifts too. Like Valentine’s Day and White Day all rolled into one.”

“I was thinking it was more like Christmas Eve, with the way couples go on dates,” Kaoru said, calling over a waitress to take Shinya’s order before the drummer could respond. He wondered if he was blushing at the suggestion, not that Shinya would think of this as a date, though he did like men. That was something Shinya didn’t hide from the band, having come out to them all in the very early days. Kyo already knew off course, had sat defensively next to his good friend making it clear that he would get mad if anyone said anything nasty to him. None of them did. Toshiya and Die had teased Shinya a little but it had all been in good humour, Shinya wasn’t offended at all. Time passed and nothing had really changed among them. It was just accepted that Shinya liked men and the rest of them liked women.

Kaoru though found his reaction rather different to the others. He didn’t share Kyo’s fierce protectiveness, though he had always thought he would be fully supportive if a friend came out to him. His tattoos made him different, the music they made together made him different, he certainly hadn’t been one to fit in and be normal, he certainly couldn’t expect the same of his friends. Not that it was anything but normal to be homosexual, it was just rarer and for that reason Shinya would always stand out in a society so determined to act like everyone was the same.

He hadn’t wanted to tease Shinya like Toshiya and Die either. He didn’t need the jokes to feel comfortable around the other, to test how things between them were going to be from now on. He had simple acted as he always did, calm, collected, in control, whilst inside his emotions were in turmoil. Shinya’s confession had brought up things he had always kept buried deep inside but now he was thinking about such things, his emotions were all over the place. It was Kyo who had questioned his silence, turning all eyes on the guitarist as they waited for his judgment. Somehow he had remained calm, giving a shrug and telling them it was no big deal, he was perfectly fine with whatever gender any of the others wanted to date. That at least had been an honest answer and he felt Shinya appreciated that he hadn’t made a big deal over the situation.

The thing was, Kaoru had already known that he wasn’t as straight as the others in the band. He loved women, of that he had no doubts, but his feelings towards them had never been entirely exclusive. He ignored his obsession with a classmate of his in school, pretended that his work colleague at his first real job was just that but this time he couldn’t ignore the feelings a pretty man brought up in him. He needed to know what these feelings were, needed to confess how he felt. These emotions were truly starting to eat him up inside. If a shy man like Shinya could be honest, then he had no excuses not to be the same.

He waited for the waitress to bring Shinya the tea he had ordered, chatting about the antics of their friends which always brought a smile to Shinya’s face. The drummer cared so much for everyone in the band, Kaoru wasn’t under the impression he would be any different. He casually looked around him, seeing no other Asians around them that might understand Japanese. That didn’t mean that nobody here did understand them but he was going to take the risk.

“Can I ask you something?” Kaoru asked, his confident façade not cracking as the question came out into the open. “What is it like being gay?”

“I don’t know, it’s just who I am,” Shinya answered, which honestly was a fair point. He hadn’t phrased his question very well. “How am I meant to answer that? What’s it like being straight?”

“Point taken,” Kaoru answered, not sure how he hadn’t visibly reacted to Shinya’s words. Straight, the one thing he was pretty sure he was not. If only he knew for certain, that would make things easier. “Well let’s try something else. What type of men do you like? You never did tell us. That was sneaky, answering your favourite type of women with ‘I like men’”.

“I’d been trying to tell you guys for ages!” Shinya protested. So, he had struggled to be honest too? That was kind of a relief and he wasn’t at all surprised. Shinya was very private, it took a good relationship with him before he would open up. “When the moment came up, I had to take it. Anyway. I like men. That’s my type.”

“That’s avoiding the question.” Kaoru teased him. Shinya smirked at him, clearly being difficult on purpose, but as expected he didn’t keep his secrets from Kaoru for long.

“Well a love of music is important,” Shinya began thoughtfully. “It’s my life and I’d like to be with somebody who understood that. Who knew how insane our schedules can be and not hold it against me. To me the band comes first. I guess that’s why I’m single?”

“You and me both,” Kaoru agreed. For him the band had always been his priority, everyone knew it, but he hadn’t quite expected the same dedication from Shinya. He had always assumed the others had other priorities, the band coming in second or third. “What else?”

“I don’t know,” Shinya confessed. “I judge people for who they are, having a type cuts people off. How do you know that the next man you meet won’t be your true love? If he had the wrong hair colour, the wrong build, the wrong hobbies, it’d be a shame not to try and get to know him. Wouldn’t it? Besides, humans never know what they really want. We think we do, but when we get it it’s not what we wanted at all.”

“I thought I had a type,” Kaoru answered, thinking over Shinya’s words. “Only I’m not so sure that it’s my type anymore. At least, it is my type, but I think I have another type to. If that makes sense? I guess I’m rambling? Not like me, right?”

“Not like you at all,” Shinya said as he took a sip of his tea. He gave Kaoru a curious look, figuring out what the problem was. “Kaoru, if you want to say something to me, I think you should just say it. I don’t think you’re quite as calm as you are pretending. Whatever is bothering you, just tell me.”

“I think my type, the other type, may just be you.” Kaoru confessed, unable to make eye contact with the drummer. There, he’d said it. As he liked to do, he had dived straight in, all there was to do now was wait for the consequences to reveal themselves.

“You like girls like me?” Shinya asked. Of all the times for him to misunderstand, why did it have to be now?

“You misunderstand,” Kaoru said gently. “I have a type when it comes to women, that hasn’t really changed, but this second type… When I was in high school I had a classmate with gentle features, shy and sweet. In my first job there was a guy with long hair, quiet and reserved but so very kind. Now I’m in a band, there’s this guy who...” 

“Wait? Are you saying you like me?” Shinya interrupted, “In what way?”

“In a, I can’t take my eyes off you, kind of way,” Kaoru admitted. “You’re beautiful and kind, sweet and gentle and I have feelings for you.”

“I see,” Shinya responded thoughtfully. “Are you sure that these feelings for me aren’t just misplaced curiosity. You didn’t quite say it, I think you were scared to offend me, but this type of men you describe match very much to your idea of femininity.”

“I don’t think it’s just curiosity, this is very real.” Kaoru confirmed. He’d certainly been able to get off to porn featuring both or either gender. He was bisexual, that was what he had finally been able to admit to himself. What he was trying to confess to Shinya.

“Have you ever been with a man?” Shinya asked, growing thoughtful for a moment when Kaoru confessed that he hadn’t. “Well then, what do you want to do with these feelings of yours?”

“I want to see how things will go between us,” Kaoru admitted. “Though I’m very aware this could end in heartbreak for both of us, even threaten the band. I just don’t want to ignore these feelings and live with regrets that they were never explored. I think that would destroy me. I booked a table in a restaurant for tonight, nothing too romantic. You can choose if we go as friends or if you want it to be a date.”

“Well if you believe these feelings are real and that it could go somewhere, let’s call it a date,” Shinya said with a smile that suggested he was being more than kind. “You know, you ask me my type and I have to admit, I’ve always had a thing for men with tattoos.”

Shinya had insisted in changing his clothes for their date and Kaoru was so very glad that he had. The other man looked simply stunning, a blend of masculine and feminine styles that suited him perfectly. He began to wonder if his own effort had even been enough but Shinya hadn’t seemed concerned.

As expected, for they were already good friends, their dinner was fun and conversation remained interesting. Slowly, as he got used to the idea, he found himself flirting with the other who returned in kind. Shinya was letting him take the lead but at the same time he seemed to be steering the conversation exactly where he wanted it to go.

They weren’t the only gay couple in the restaurant, their appeared to be two others, so Kaoru found himself quite relaxed when he took Shinya’s hand in his as they left. If anyone was bothered, they didn’t react to them. How different things were here to back home, he found this quiet acceptance quite refreshing.

As they walked back to the hotel they were staying in, he began to ask Shinya questions regarding how people treated him back home. He was shocked and horrified at times as Shinya described awkward situations he had experienced. The drummer wasn’t trying to scare him, he was being honest about what his life would be like if they dated each other, or any other men for that matter.

“You’re braver than I could ever imagine.” Kaoru admitted, more than impressed by the way Shinya had handled himself in one particular story.

“It’s not bravery, it’s a quiet acceptance of myself,” Shinya explained. “I know logically, emotionally, perhaps even spiritually, that being gay is perfectly fine. I have no shame for what I am, no hatred, no desire to be anything different. When these people try to make me feel anything else, they fail every time. Isn’t that how you are, when people make nasty remarks about your tattoos or the music that we make?”

“I guess that’s the difference between us, I’m still not at the point where I’ve truly accepted myself,” Kaoru confessed. “I mean, until recently I refused to even acknowledge that there was a part of me that could even like men. It started with me realising that I liked you. I thought you were the exception but the more I thought about it, the more I realised that you weren’t the exception at all. Not that you’re not the one I want to date. Don’t get the wrong idea!”

“It takes time,” Shinya promised as they reached the hotel. They dropped hands as they walked through the lobby to the lift on the far side. As soon as they had privacy to continue their conversation, Shinya spoke again. “Do you want to come to my room? To talk, to watch a film, to experiment?”

“I was about to ask the same thing, though perhaps not as well as you put it,” Kaoru said, so very relieved that Shinya had no expectations of what they were going to do once they were alone. “Only I would have offered my room. If you want to go to yours though…”

“Come to mine,” Shinya ordered and with a smile Kaoru passed his own door and joined Shinya in his room. The drummer had decorated in here with a few paper hearts but it was the gift he handed to Kaoru that took the guitarist by surprise. When had Shinya even found time to buy anything? “It’s not much but… Well I thought if you wanted to think of me as feminine, I’d act that way tonight and be a girl buying their crush chocolates.”

“Shinya, act like yourself!” Kaoru scolded, but he still found himself pulling off the paper as Shinya urged him to do. He revealed a simple box of chocolates, nothing fancy but the thought behind them placed their value far more than the small amount Shinya had paid for the box. “How did you know I like chocolate?”

“I stalk you, don’t you know,” Shinya teased as he removed the jacket he wore and placed it down on a chair. “I follow you to work, I’ve been in your home, to your gym, I stalk you when you go shopping. You can’t escape me.”

“Is it stalking when you work with me and were invited to all those places?” Kaoru queried.

“I think it depends on intentions,” Shinya answered. “For me, all those times, I had wanted to do this.”

“Do what?” Kaoru asked, surprised when he felt Shinya’s lips join with his. He stood frozen for a moment before wrapping his arms around the other and taking control of this embrace. Kissing was easy, he’d done it enough times and he cared for Shinya deeply. He had half wondered what it would be like kissing a man but now knew that was a silly thing to have wondered about. It was like kissing anyone. Shinya’s lips were soft and responsive, his arms wrapped around him making Kaoru feel comfortable and secure. He still felt the stirrings inside him, the hints that he knew meant if they continued, the kiss would no longer remain so sweet and simple.

He didn’t think about breaking the embrace, deepening the kiss, realising as they held each other that Shinya must have been attracted to him for a long time too. He couldn’t think of a time when Shinya had acted differently around him, the other had always seemed to want to just be friends. Only now he thought about it, except for Kyo, it was himself that Shinya seemed to get on with best.

“How long have you liked me and done nothing?” Kaoru asked, pushing Shinya down onto the bed and positioning himself over the drummer so they could kiss again. He stayed waiting for the other’s answer, admiring Shinya’s flushed cheeks with affection.

“How long have you done the same?” Shinya challenged. He was being difficult again, refusing to answer questions. As their lips joined again, Kaoru avoided his own answer. He didn’t want to think about when it was that he had first liked Shinya. The day they met, the first time they had hung out alone? Had the feelings grown slowly or always been there? He didn’t know and decided it didn’t even matter. The past couldn’t be changed, what matted now was their sweet embrace.

He lay on top of Shinya, pinning him down as the other’s hands slip beneath his shirt, running over his back with gentle touches. The drummer’s hands had been cold at first from their walk in the freezing wind but they warmed up quickly and were never unpleasant.

“I can’t believe you actually want to do this,” Shinya got out as Kaoru’s lips met his. “I never even wanted to think about kissing you. I thought it would never happen.”

“Well how could you know my sexuality, when I didn’t know it myself?” Kaoru asked. He wondered if he knew his sexuality now, another question where the answer didn’t matter. He wanted Shinya and Shinya wanted him. What more was there to think about?

Carefully he helped Shinya out of the shirt he was wearing, allowing his own T-shirt to be pulled off his own body and once again they were kissing. It was strange having his chest pressed against another man’s like this, the familiar feeling of warm skin did not have the curves that he was used to. He found he lay flatter on Shinya that he would have with a woman, was less concerned about his weight being too much for the other to bear. It seemed that everything with Shinya was going to be like this, so familiar and yet so different from what he had ever experienced before. He was enjoying this though, the tender touches that the other was sharing with him, the hands that were wandering down his back and then below his waist. He knew Shinya wanted more from him but feeling the hard erection pressing against his crotch filled him with second thoughts. This wasn’t familiar at all and he wasn’t so sure he liked it.

“What’s wrong?” Shinya asked, noticing that Kaoru’s lead over their kisses had come to an end. “Is this too much?”

“It’s different,” Kaoru confessed. “But I don’t think it’s different in a bad way.”

“Do you want to stop, or just continue as we were?” Shinya offered. They were both options he didn’t want Kaoru to take but the fact that they were offered to him, that Shinya was putting his needs first, made Kaoru pick the unspoken option.

“I want to continue but I think you may need to humour me a little.” Kaoru admitted. He wasn’t used to being insecure, wasn’t used to not being in control, it left him feeling almost frightened. He wondered what Shinya thought of his indecision but his face was giving nothing away.

“Of course, I was nervous my first time with a man as well,” Shinya confessed. Now that was something Kaoru would have predicted but he didn’t comment on it. He kissed Shinya again, growing used to the feeling of having another man’s arousal pressing against his own. He was hard, he realised as an afterthought, his body wanted this even if his mind was still a little hesitant. “Undress me, I want you to see everything.”

“Now that’s a tempting offer.” Kaoru flirted but his hand still hesitated before it made its way to the fastening of Shinya’s trousers. He undressed Shinya carefully, glad that they had both already removed their shoes as the boots Shinya had worn took some time to unlace and he didn’t have the patience for that. He deliberately took the time to look over what was now on show feeling his arousal grow but also his nerves. Everything was on offer to him but he had no idea what to do with it.

“Shut your eyes,” Shinya ordered as he took Kaoru’s hand in his. The guitarist did as asked, allowing his hand to be led to Shinya’s arousal and slowly getting used to feeling it beneath his fingers. With his eyes shut he could almost imagine he was simply touching himself, what a clever trick Shinya had. His eyes opened and he took in Shinya’s smile. “Do whatever you want.”

“You’re offering me yourself, what if this was all to go wrong?” Kaoru asked but Shinya’s smile didn’t falter. Perhaps he already knew what Kaoru was beginning to suspect, this was going to work out just fine.

As he stroked Shinya’s length, he moved his mouth down onto Shinya’s hard left nipple, sucking lightly and teasing him with his tongue before moving to the other side. He’d never thought men would be so sensitive here but Shinya seemed to like it. His mouth or his hand he wondered? He considered if he could use his mouth in replace of his hand but the very idea made him freeze up. How could he do something so intimate with Shinya? He wasn’t ready for that at all.

“You Kaoru, can be quite a coward!” Shinya teased, surprising Kaoru as he pushed the other down onto the bed beside him. Lying back Kaoru stared in surprise as Shinya helped him out of his own clothes, not even pausing before he wrapped his mouth around his erection. With a moan Kaoru lay in shock, happy to allow Shinya to please him like this. He had never seen Shinya this determined before, not in his social life. When it came to music Shinya was more than confident when he stated his opinion, it was clear that music was his passion. It seemed then that perhaps sex with men was something Shinya was just as passionate about. He had to admit it, he liked seeing this side of the other.

If he wanted, with Shinya’s long hair and lack of facial hair, he could shut his eyes and imagine that he was with a woman. Instead he allowed his eyes to roam Shinya’s body, so masculine and tempting to him. He began to grow complacent, enjoying the pleasure that was being given to him, disappointed when Shinya pulled away far too soon.

“I want you inside me,” Shinya said simply, slipping off the bed and retrieving a bottle of lube. “Have you ever done anal before?”

“Once, she put up such a fuss we never tried again.” Kaoru admitted. The girl had complained that it hurt, despite his best efforts and they had stopped before it had really begun.

“Straight men usually don’t realise how much preparation it takes.” Shinya scolded, as if he was the one at fault! Still it seemed the drummer trusted him enough to hand over the lube and lie down, his legs parted expectantly for Kaoru’s fingers. He felt nervous again, knowing that Shinya would be judging his efforts. With lube coated fingers he moved to Shinya’s entrance, sliding one finger inside easily enough. Slowly he began to move his finger, knowing enough to be slow.

“Ok, this is good,” Shinya reassured him. “But I like to be teased before I’m entered. You’re already rushing.”

“I’m not!” Kaoru protested, but he didn’t enter a second finger like he had been about to.

“Up a little,” Shinya ordered, gasping in pleasure as Kaoru stroked a sensitive spot. “That’s perfect.”

“Yes Sensei.” Kaoru teased, moving to kiss Shinya so as not to face anymore judgment. As his tongue slipped into Shinya’s mouth, he moved in the second finger and found no protests from the other. He found the spot Shinya liked again, teasing him there as he stretched the other, feeling the other moan into their shared kiss.

“Are you ready?” He asked, getting a disbelieving look from the other.

“With two fingers? I’m not that loose.” Shinya scolded. Well then, it really had been his fault with the girl then? He felt guilty that his own naivety had brought her pain but it wasn’t like she had corrected him either. She hadn’t guided him, not like Shinya had.

He used some more lube, suspecting that Shinya might scold him again if he didn’t, and entered three fingers into the other’s body. This Shinya took well, especially when he found the sweet spot and began teasing him once more.

“That’s it,” Shinya gasped, “You have no idea how much I love that it’s you doing this to me.”

“Even though you scold me?” Kaoru asked.

“I guided you, not scolded,” Shinya scolded Kaoru once more. “Don’t be one of those men who get a complex about being told how to improve in the bedroom.”

“I’m not one of those men.” Kaoru answered, they both knew that he was. Shinya saw right through him, didn’t he? Strangely his judgement didn’t concern Kaoru, he liked that he had actually met his match for once. Shinya wasn’t going to let him get away with anything he didn’t like but in return there were no demands on Kaoru that he had to do anything at all. They trusted and cared for each other, that was what was making this night so special.

When he was sure Shinya was ready, he carried on for a good minute, enjoying their shared kisses feeling no rush to penetrate the other. Shinya had wanted him to take his time tonight and for that Kaoru was glad. Had they rushed he suspected he would still not have known if he could enjoy time with the other. This way he had gotten used to being with a man, finding that when it came to his own desires this was no different than being with a woman.

“May I?” Kaoru asked, hoping he wasn’t embarrassing himself again.

“Yes, but use protection and lots of lube, enter slowly and then stop until I say otherwise.” Shinya ordered. Well he knew his own body better than Kaoru could, so the guitarist pulled on the condom he had brought just in case and reached for the lube and coated his now aching arousal liberally before slowly pushing his way inside Shinya. The other opened up easily for him, with no gasps of pain or gritting of teeth. Quite the opposite, Shinya seemed to enjoy the way Kaoru was stretching him just that little further as he moved inside. When he couldn’t go any deeper, Kaoru stopped and moved to kiss Shinya once more. He couldn’t get enough of those lips, he found that they were the most appealing aspect of the drummer and the thought of them around his arousal came right back into mind. That had been good and if he treated Shinya well, he suspected he could feel them against him again.

“You’re big, I like that,” Shinya confessed. “But it also means that I need to be really prepared. I’m sorry if I sounded judgmental before.”

“You did nothing wrong.” Kaoru reassured him. Slowly he moved his hips, not having Shinya’s permission but figuring if he was slow it would be all right. Shinya smiled up at him, perhaps happy that Kaoru was figuring this out for himself. The drummer shifted beneath him, giving him better access and Kaoru slowly moved inside him. Now this was what he had imagined anal sex would be like. Tight and warm, the other’s heat surrounding his arousal in the most delightful of ways. They had needed all that lube, all that time making sure Shinya was ready, but the pay off was worth it. 

“You’re having sex with a man,” Shinya teased. “You homo!”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Kaoru responded. “Women are as sexy as hell.”

“If you say so,” Shinya answered. “Don’t worry, I can be your woman. I’m sure I have some my dresses still.”

“Now that would be great.” Kaoru admitted. It was true, it was Shinya’s femininity that had attracted him but he liked the other’s masculinity too. Perhaps a man like Shinya was perfect for a man who was beginning to realise that he really was bisexual?

“Your predictable,” Shinya said, giving Kaoru a smile. “Now take me like you mean it. I’m ready for whatever you can give.”

“You’ll never be ready.” Kaoru warned, picking up the pace and thrusting hard into the other. Shinya gasped, in pleasure he assumed, and begged for more. Picking up the pace further, Kaoru really began to pound into the other man, delighted that Shinya could take it. He’d never had permission to be so rough but Shinya was loving it and so was he.

He kept up the pace, his movements forceful but precise as he took his pleasure from the other. Beneath him Shinya was turning into a withering mess, his moans growing louder, the pleasure felt between them growing immensely. Selfishly Kaoru focused on his own needs, letting Shinya stroke himself, sure the other would do a better job of it anyway. He didn’t want to quite admit he still wasn’t entirely comfortable touching another man’s genitalia but he would learn to get used to it, maybe even love it as Shinya seemed to do.

He came with a moan of his own, falling against Shinya as the other’s wet warmth spilled between them. He felt guilty now that he had left Shinya to finish himself off, not that Shinya seemed put out at all.

“Well that was a good effort, I’d give you a two out of ten.” Shinya declared. For a moment Kaoru thought the other was serious but his smile said otherwise.

“You’re rating me low to make me try harder next time,” Kaoru scolded him. “That’s sneaky and cruel.”

“If there will be a next time, with a score like that…” Shinya trailed off as he began laughing. “Well you will never know.”

“It’s fine, you were just a Valentine’s Day fling anyway.” Kaoru answered, as he rolled off Shinya and pulled the other into his arms. “I couldn’t imagine having to look at your face every day.”

“You think you can get rid of a stalker so easily?” Shinya challenged and suddenly instead of making love they were arguing. The good kind of arguing, where it was nothing but teasing and lightly making fun of each other. Unable to stop smiling, Kaoru realised that they were going to have to tell the others eventually but that was a concern for another time. Right now it was Valentine’s Day and he was going to spend it in the company of the man he adored. Perhaps there was something to this Western version of the holiday? At very least, it had given him the confidence to confess his feelings to the other. That had been the start of what he hoped to be a long and loving relationship. For now, the band was safe and he was no longer alone. What a perfect end to the day.


End file.
